My obsessions

Ah, the little things in life. 

Right now I am loving my Paddywax Library collection candle in "Leo Tolstoy." Although his books aren't my very favorite, I adore the mix of plum, persimmon, and oakmoss. It's soothing and sultry and just smells writerly. 

"Enter One" by Sol Seppy. This is my favorite song for savasana, both mellow and uplifting/energizing. It gets me to relax but in a way that I'm raring to get back to life at the end instead of feeling like a nap would be nice. I think it's too slow for any of my ballroom dances, but I might take it to Dmitri and see if we can work something out. I'd love to dance to it. 

The Men Who Keep Me Single: #1

Friends always like to ask how online dating is going. Any romance in your life? Any new guys you want to tell us about? Well, the answers are not well, no, and you better believe it. When someone says, "I can't believe you're still single. Maybe you're being too picky.", first I have to let my rage subside. I have every right to be "picky" - I've been single for ten years. While I would love to have a romantic relationship in my life, I know that my life can be just as exciting without one. And then there's this: is it picky to expect a man to write an email that says more than "hi!"? Is it picky not to want to date the stoner in California? Is it picky to decline dates with the creepy, the crazy, the hopeless? Here are the men who keep me single.

(This email is as close to verbatim as I could remember. But it was pretty memorable.)

Without any greeting or farewell, or any kind of nicety, our guy today just jumps right into it:

"I have tickets to the museum where they have all the arms and legs from the statues in other museums."

Well! I'm guessing a date with this young man goes one of two ways. 1. A very uncomfortable few moments in his mother's basement while I look at stolen mannequin arms and legs and question my own sanity for agreeing to a date in the first place. 2. As a serial killer's victim. 

Your honor, it is clear from this evidence that the defendant is not in fact "too picky." Oh, you want another example? Hold your horses. The defense rests for now. 

And away we go!

It’s time to put my time and energy where my mouth is. 

If I want to write, I will write. 

If I want to keep to a new schedule that includes working out then, damn it, I’ll get up at 5:30 and run.

And then I will not eat the tater tots. 

I will spend more time out and about in this area I’ve lived in for ten years. I’ll find the free things to do so that I can fund my next goal: to travel. 

I will spend time on self-care and mindfulness and finding the path that feels right. 

I will look for a loving relationship – first with myself, and then with a wonderful man. 

I will explore and open myself up to new experiences and friendships. 

I will find a sense of ease in the world. 

I will live until I die.